Kathy Griffin releases new plan to become more famous. Plans to harass and ridicule a 16 year old girl. Shark checks in and tells Griffin her jump came a LOOONG time ago. Researchers still seeking for clues to the last funny thing Griffin said or did.

http://www.popeater.com/2011/01/05/kathy-griffin-slams-willow-palin/?icid=maing|main5|dl2|sec1_lnk3|34632

Associated Press reports Sarah Palin had hairdresser with her on Haiti trip. TV networks run with story, blast and ridicule her. Information all wrong. "Hairdresser" was her daughter. No retraction or apology. Rabid polar bears start showing up at AP bureau locations. One way tickets to Nome appearing in office mailboxes.

http://www.adn.com/2010/12/13/1601745/palin-headlines.html

Bristol Palin's success on "Dancing With the Stars" leads to massive number of complaints to FCC. FCC responds, runs out of saliva tests for complainants. Nancy Pelosi secretly signs up at Arthur Murray. Al Sharpton blames it on the boogie.

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/celebrity/palin-success-triggered-fcc-complaints

Kathy Griffin appears at event honoring men & women in the US military. Makes fat joke about Bristol Palin. Forgets Palin's brother served in the military. Booed mercilessly by soldiers and those in attendance. Kathy Griffin has officially jumped the shark. Search continues for anything funny Griffin has ever done.

http://www.eonline.com/uberblog/b214681_bristol_palin_slams_kathy_griffins.html

Sarah Palin to take Kate Goselin camping as part of reality show. Producers handing out dinner napkins and eating utensils for local bear population. Palin celebrates, gives Kate warm winter jacket with bullseye painted on back. Episode tentatively titled "Taking Out the Trash". America prepares celebration.

http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/gossip/2010/12/sarah-palin-kate-gosselin-tlc-reality-tv-camping.html

Animal rights group blasts Sarah Palin for clubbing a dead fish. Palin offers to visit group offices for personal demonstration. In other news, Nancy Pelosi receives anonymous gift of halibut scented perfume.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-1332543/Sarah-Palin-blasted-animal-rights-group-clubbing-fish-death-TV.html