African nation prepares to make passing wind a crime. "Bush's Baked Beans" threatens legal action. Entire State of Alabama starts petition drive to insure no foreign interference.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1351174/African-country-set-make-breaking-wind-crime.html

Guy caught on tape beating up homeless man. Arrest warrant issued. Still not in custody two days later. BONUS: Guy is son of local police chief. DOUBLE BONUS: "Made in Florida" tag starts the new year out right.

http://www.cfnews13.com/article/news/2011/january/189179/Son-of-Sanford-police-lieutenant--has-not-surrendered.html

Camden NJ slashing police jobs. City recently named 2nd most dangerous city in America. Chuck Norris offers to assume PD leadership for 1 day. Concrete wall to be erected around city with entire cast of "Jersey Shore" assigned permanent relocation.

http://philadelphia.cbslocal.com/2010/12/02/camden-city-council-approves-massive-police-and-fire-layoffs/